Iconic inventions of the 18th and 19th centuries, like Edison’s Light Bulb or Charles Babbage’s Computers, have shaped our modern world. They have added convenience, meaning, and purpose to our daily lives.
On the contrary, some inventions are, to put it subtly, not so iconic, also considered useless inventions that have added nothing to anything or anybody. They are stupid inventions that have been unsuccessful in solving any ‘problems’. Instead, they have utilised and wasted a lot of valuable resources.
Some of these peculiar inventions fail to solve any problems whatsoever. Though their inventors might have the best intentions, they failed to transfer their ideas into problem-solving products.
In this blog, I have jotted together some of the most absurd and dumb inventions that will make you go, “What’s the need for it?” Let’s know more about the top 10 useless inventions in the history of mankind.
Hydrogen Airships
Though hydrogen airships cannot be considered the most useless invention, they proved to be quite dangerous. The early decades of the 20th century saw the advent of powered flights. The Zeppelin company had the bright idea of flying people in luxurious cabins across the Atlantic. In the 1920s and 1930s, this became one of the most comfortable, quick, and easiest methods of travelling from Europe to America.
But the good idea didn’t become successful, as the airships were filled with the highly explosive hydrogen gas. This resulted in a lot of accidents, airship explosions, and loss of lives. The most remembered incident is the Hindenburg disaster of 1937, when 36 people died when an airship exploded on landing. These unfortunate events led to the decline of airship travelling in the following years.
Apple Newton
Launched in the early 1990s, the Apple Newton aimed to refine the classic pen and paper combo. Though innovative, this writing device lacked purpose and efficiency. Not to mention, their handwriting recognition technology was so bad that it became unpopular very quickly. This device was expensive and mostly useless.
These years were not ideal for Apple, as it was when Steve Jobs was removed from the company. He later joined back in 1997, and in his efforts to up the game for the Newton, Apple came out with the most recognised products, the iPhone and iPad.
Diet Water
Water without any calories – a dumb concept brought to life by the beer makers of Japan, Sapporo, with their Diet Water. This is not just a stupid invention, but it displays how the weight-conscious consumers can be taken advantage of. Sapporo claims that their Diet Water has ‘peptides’ to aid in weight reduction, a stupid invention that targets people who want to lose weight without any effort. As you might already know, water has naturally zero calorific value. So, marketing bottled water as ‘diet’ is the most useless and deceiving concept ever.
These kinds of dumb inventions take advantage of the growing demand for quick-fix solutions in the personal health and fitness industry. People nowadays will buy anything to try at least once. As a normal-thinking individual, I will suggest staying away from the novelty of Diet Water and similar products. The makers of these products aim to deceive people by promoting false information and taking advantage of their insecurities.
Banana Slicer
Bananas are one of the most convenient fruits that you can get – easy to carry and prepare, and quick to fill the tummy with nutrition. The Banana Slicer was invented to make the already convenient bananas even more convenient. How? Using this tool, you can chop bananas into even slices in one swoop! Though it might be useful in some cases, like preparing a fruit salad for a party, etc. But mostly it is an unnecessary and useless invention.
This product is one of the many kitchen gadgets that are developed for very specific tasks, e.g., the egg slicer or nut cracker. We all can use the already existing items in our kitchens for these mundane jobs, like chopping a banana using your kitchen knife. These trends are getting increasingly popular, thanks to their TikTok influencer viral videos. Ultimately, the Banana Slicer is a funny example of what happens when kitchen convenience is taken a step too far.
Pet Rock
The most ‘imaginative’ Pet Rock, created by Gary Dahl, became an overnight sensation. The concept of having a pet rock, besides the regular cats, dogs, fish, etc., captured the attention of millions. In the mid-1970s, this became a cultural phenomenon as one of the most stupid yet very successful inventions.
The Pet Rock creator, Gary, marketed these simple rocks as a lovable pet that came with a carry case and a comprehensive user’s manual. These pets had no scope for growth, and no potential besides just sitting ideal. These rocks show how any useless product can become popular among thousands with smart marketing and branding. This invention has become one of the most iconic useless inventions in recent history.
Goldfish Walker
Pet care and uselessness walk hand-in-hand when it comes to our next stupid invention called the Goldfish Walker. This is a transparent fishbowl that comes with wheels to take your pet fish for a walk. The idea behind this is that you can give your fish a change of scenery and improve their boring life. That’s the last thing your pet fish needs, since fish are vaguely unaware of their surroundings.
Though the Goldfish Walker is developed keeping the fish’s best interests in mind, in reality, it serves no purpose. This invention highlights the desperation of pet owners to buy and do anything to keep their pets happy without thinking of the real benefits. Also, the amusing invention shows in what lengths pet owners can go to establish a connection with their pets and their desire to give them the best life possible!
Shoe Umbrella
The Shoe Umbrella is meant is solve a problem that requires no solving at all. It is essentially a small umbrella that attaches to your shoes and protects them from rain, mud, and unfavourable conditions. This is a bright example of stupid inventions that work on novelty and solve very specific problems.
But critics are not-so-happy about this, due to their ineffectiveness and awful fashion statement! Their design also fails to completely protect your shoes from rain that comes from the side or muddy conditions. Instead, carrying an umbrella or wearing waterproof shoes is a more convenient and practical approach.
Walking Sleeping Bag
Keeping warm and cosy while you walk, how amazing does that sound? That’s what led to the Walking Sleeping Bag, a sleeping bag with legs that allows the user to walk around while staying warm in their bedding. This idea might sound great for outdoors, camping, or chilling winter nights, but your regular fur jacket can do the job too.
The Walking Sleeping Bag allows limited movement with added bulk, which is completely unnecessary and cumbersome for walks in the wilderness. Instead, wearing a warm, woollen jacket on top of your regular outdoor clothing will be much more practical and simple. This useless invention is an example of why sticking to the basics can be best at times.
USB Pet Rock
Continuing with the Pet Rock obsession, after the 1970s, this dumb invention got a ‘much-needed’ makeover. In modern times, the Pet Rock was reinvented as a rock with a USB attachment that you can connect to your computer. The benefit? Nothing. Just like before, it stayed inert without doing anything at all – no data storage function, no performance improvement of the connected device, and no interaction with any software.
The USB Pet Rock is a nod to its ancestor, the Pet Rock, imbuing all its useless properties. It was developed to give the users a feel of nostalgia without any practical use cases at all.
DVD Rewinder
The DVD Rewinder is one of the most useless inventions of modern times. This was created to bring back the nostalgia of the VHS tapes. Though VHS tapes required continual rewinding to maintain their usability and lifespan, DVDs do not require this process. Being digital, DVDs can self-rewind with the press of a button. Having another device just to rewind them serves the opposite of practicality.
The DVD Rewinder was not generated as a useful product but as a prank gift that lets you relive your childhood days.
Through these 10 useless inventions, we can see that smart marketing can sell anything, be it water without calories, or mini umbrellas for your precious pair. Some of them are great ideas but lack execution, while others are created to serve a purpose that does not need serving. Some trigger the nostalgic brain cells, while others are pure marketing gimmicks to take money out of your pocket. Whatever it is, these dumb inventions are funny and can make consumers understand the difference between practical products and unnecessary trash that goes viral for a time.
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